Week-End Review: Travels across the blogiverse this week

Four years ago today, Tall Paul proposed to me on Stearns Wharf in Santa Barbara. I said yes. Weather permitting, we’re hoping to revisit the scene of the crime this weekend. What do you have planned? I heard there’s a big football game or something on Sunday.

Dispatches: Links of the Week

Making assumptions about parenting, whether they involve your kids or your pets; making decisions about your kids’ schooling when none of the options are perfect

Charity may begin at home, but that doesn’t mean it should never go elsewhere

How to make sure your resume gets ignored

The Blog Improvement Project is back for 2010! Task #1: Making a list of specific design/content changes to implement

>> Bonus Dispatch: A little Friday Fun from the Inbox

It’s been a while since I shared an e-mail from one of my relatives, so here’s a “21-Pun Salute” to start off the weekend, courtesy of my uncle!

1. To write with a broken pencil is pointless.

2. When fish are in schools they sometimes take debate.

3. A thief who stole a calendar got 12 months.

4. When the smog lifts in Los Angeles, U.C.L.A.

5. The professor discovered that her theory of earthquakes was on shaky ground.

6. The batteries were given out free of charge.

7. A dentist and a manicurist got married. They fought tooth and nail.

8. A will is a dead give-away.

9. If you don’t pay your exorcist you can get repossessed.

10. Show me a piano falling down a mineshaft and I will show you A-Flat miner.

11. You are stuck with your debt if you can’t budge it.

12. A boiled egg is hard to beat.

13. When you’ve seen one shopping center you’ve seen a mall.

14. Police were called to the day center when a three year old was resisting a rest.

15. Did you hear about the fellow whose whole left side was cut off? He’s all right now.

16. If you take your laptop for a run, you could jog your memory.

17. A bicycle can’t stand alone. It’s two tired.

18. When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds.

19. The guy who fell on the upholstery machine was fully recovered.

20. He had a photographic memory which was never developed.

21. When she saw her first strands of gray, she thought she would dye.


“We All Have Our Limits,” via Not Always Right

Retail | Leeds, UK
(A customer comes to the counter with his son with a Grand Theft Auto game.)
Me: “Sir, you are aware this is an 18 rated game?”
Customer: “Yes, I am aware of that.”
Me: “It contains sex.”
Customer: “Okay.”
Me: “Violence.”
Customer: “Okay.”
Me: “Bad Language.”
Customer: “Okay.”
Me: “Drug Usage.”
Customer: “Okay.”
Me: “Full frontal male nudity.”
Customer: “He’s bloody well not having this!”
(The customer hands the game over to me and walks out.)

I guess one has to draw the line – or the fig leaf (?) – somewhere…


Blogthings Quiz of the Week:

What Dance Are You?

You Are Ballroom Dancing
You are sophisticated and classy. Definitely not the type to be seen dancing on a bar.
You are a bit old fashioned. You prefer dance to be subtly sexy, not in your face sexy.

You are sentimental and nostalgic. You appreciate the beauty of old things.
You are even tempered and cooperative. You work well with a partner.

Yeah, I’m sophisticated and classy…till I trip on the stairs and drop food in my lap. But if I could dance worth anything, ballroom would definitely be my thing.


TGIF, y’all!

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8 comments

  1. Regardless of the weather (rain, I think I saw on the news), it has to be better than the nearly 2 feet of snow we're getting here. Congratulations and I hope you do get to go to Santa Barbara. (And thanks for the link, too!)

  2. Alisonwonderland – Help yourself! I know puns are a love/hate thing, but I love them :-). Glad you do too!

    Melissa – Yep, it's rain here. My son lives in DC, and I was chatting with him about the snow earlier today. At least we'll be able to leave the house.

    Thanks for a great post to link to!

  3. happy weekend and hope you enjoy SB. it's so beautiful there–we visited in 2007.

    as for the puns–excellent! i'm always looking for new ones when i try to explain them to my students. they are tired of 'i used to work for coca cola, but then i got canned.' lol. or, worse: i used to work for victoria secret but then i got a pink slip. ugh. 🙂

  4. I love the link about what not to do on your resume. It's actually kind of helpful, LOL! 🙂 And the puns- gotta love the puns.

  5. Natalie – Both of those puns are new to me! Glad you liked these, though.

    And I'm not sure if I've seen you comment here before…so it this is your first time, welcome!

    Marie – I agree; the cover-letter thing is good pre-emptive advice :-).