“…You might be a mother” of a meme

The following was originally published on the LA Moms Blog by my friend, the very funny Anna Lefler. I thought it might make a good meme, and she has graciously allowed me to turn it into one – thanks, Anna!

Here’s how it will work:

Copy and paste this whole thing into your blog (or an e-mail, if that’s how you roll), and add one or two of your own “you might be a mother” thoughts at the end. Please identify your additions! Then post or e-mail, encouraging your readers to make their own additions and keep it circulating.

No tagging unless you really want to – this meme is free for the taking, but a link back to the blog where you found it would be very welcome!

Anna’s original musings on how to tell that you might be a mother:
If you’ve ever lusted in your heart after another woman’s European umbrella stroller…you might be a mother.
If you’ve ever excused yourself from an adult gathering to go “winkle,”…you might be a mother.
If you’ve ever gone on a date night and spent the whole evening talking about your children…you might be a mother.
If you’ve ever given a fifth of scotch and your therapist’s business card as a baby-shower gift…you might be a mother.
If you’ve ever snuggled with one of your child’s stuffed animals in a hotel room when you had to travel alone…you might be a mother.

If you’ve ever driven past McDonald’s and told your children that they’re “out” of hamburgers and fries…again…you might be a mother.
If you’ve ever changed a squirming toddler’s diaper in midair rather than touch anything in a nasty roadside bathroom…you might be a mother.
If you’ve ever spent your lunchtime explaining to your friend how you would handle the bratty kid at the next table…you might be a mother.
If you’ve ever seen a creepy stranger hovering around a public playground and known, in that moment, that you could kill a man with your bare hands…you might be a mother.
If it takes you three hours to prepare for a two-hour trip to the beach…you might be a mother.
If you are the only person in your home who knows the location of swim goggles, hydrogen peroxide and piano recital music…you might be a mother.
If you’ve ever secretly gloated when your frightened child ran to you for comfort rather than to his father…you might be a mother.
If you’ve ever stayed up at night when you could barely keep your eyes open to write a note from the Tooth Fairy in secret fairy code…you might be a mother.
If silence in your home fills you with happiness – followed immediately by dread…you might be a mother.
If you’ve ever been so desperate to get your child to stop crying on a long car trip that you’ve offered her all the cash in your wallet…you might be a mother.
If you’ve ever had your child blow his nose into a tissue, then found yourself using the same tissue on your nose five minutes later…you might be a mother.
If you’ve ever reached across the table without thinking and wiped your husband’s mouth with your napkin…you might be a mother.
If you think your man is at his sexiest when he takes the children on a bike ride so you can have a couple of hours for yourself…you might be a mother.
If you’ve ever been startled from a deep sleep and exclaimed, “Goodnight, moon!”…you might be a mother.
If you’ve ever grudgingly admitted that your mother knew a few things after all…you might be a mother.
[With apologies – and much admiration and respect – to Mr. Jeff Foxworthy.]

Florinda’s additions:
If you find yourself picking up after people you don’t even know…you might be a mother.

If you dole out cold medicine and tissues at the first sound of someone’s sniffle…you might be a mother. (Bonus points if you check for a fever via the hand-on-forehead method.)

If you make your family members change their clothes because YOU’RE too hot or too cold…you might be a mother.

Your turn! Copy, paste, add your own, and pass it on via blog or e-mail – and please leave me a comment if you decide to play!

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  • https://www.blogger.com/profile/12051174636017409935 April

    I love your last addition! That’s SO my mother. Not me. NEVER me, of course :)

  • https://www.blogger.com/profile/09789402061034734894 Florinda

    April – It was my mom too. And I have to admit, sometimes it’s me :-).

  • https://www.blogger.com/profile/13425141684712829990 Scobberlotcher

    Oh, I love, love, love this. I will have to post it, too.

  • https://www.blogger.com/profile/06968276973881720329 Anna Lefler

    Hey, Florinda! You are so cool to do this! It makes me happy to see people have fun with it… Thanks so much!

    And have a wonderful Thanksgiving!



  • https://www.blogger.com/profile/09789402061034734894 Florinda

    Karen H (Scobberlotcher) – Great – that’s the idea! Keep it going. I’m looking forward to seeing your additions!

    Anna L – Thanks for letting me run with your great idea – I REALLY hope it takes off!

  • https://www.blogger.com/profile/06863703037623512619 Bookish Ruth

    “If you make your family members change their clothes because YOU’RE too hot or too cold…you might be a mother.”

    My mother still does this to me…and I’m 26. It takes less effort to go put on a warmer shirt than it does to convince her that really, I’m fine! I will NOT catch my death!

  • https://www.blogger.com/profile/09789402061034734894 Florinda

    Ruth – Yeah, that sounds familiar. Maybe that one should end with “…you definitely ARE a mother.”

  • https://www.blogger.com/profile/08054617845836379649 Tall Paul

    If your name is Shaft, you’re a bad mother…

  • https://www.blogger.com/profile/09789402061034734894 Florinda

    Tall Paul – Shut yo’ mouth! :-)

  • https://www.blogger.com/profile/08054617845836379649 Tall Paul

    …but I’m talkin’ about Shaft!

  • https://www.blogger.com/profile/09789402061034734894 Florinda

    I think those two comments are the first ones my husband has ever left here. And for the record, it’s always like that around our house.